Queer Poco el Mono Ara National Football Team
From NSwiki, the NationStates encyclopedia.
| Nickname | The Whites |
| Manager |  Joseph Hamburgstein
|
| Captain |  Tomasz Poborsky
|
| Most caps | Tomasz Poborsky
|
| Top scorer | Ishmael Van Dyke
|
| KPB rank | 50th |
| Highest KPB ranking | 47th |
| First international Queer Poco el Mono Ara 1–4 Dancougar (Friendly) | |
| First competitive international Queer Poco el Mono Ara 1–4 Qazox (OXEN Cup XI) | |
| Largest competitive win Queer Poco el Mono Ara 7-1 Teletropis ( World Cup 49 Qualifiers) | |
| Worst defeat Somewhereistonia 5–1 Queer Poco El Mono Ara (Friendly) | |
| World Cup | |
| Appearances | 0 |
The Queer Poco el Mono Ara football team represents the nation of the same name in international football (soccer) competitions. The national team has taken part or continues to participate in, The World Cup,Cup of Harmony, regional Copa Rushmori, OXEN Cup, Phoenix Cup and Baptism of Fire. The national team is controlled by the QPeMAFA, the organisers and govenors of football in Queer Poco el Mono Ara.
Queer Poco el Mono Ara also have an under 21's team, who have participated in Di Bradini Cup 10, reaching the final against Candelaria and Marquez and suffering a 1 - 0 defeat.
Contents |
[edit] History
Queer Poco el Mono Ara's first venture into international football was a friendly match against Dancougar under the supervision of interim manager Mick McConaghey. The match ended in a 4 - 1 defeat and McConaghey's tenure as Queer Poco coach lasted no longer than 1 game. Queer Poco el Mono Ara's KPB ranking has since drastically risen over subsequent competitions, moving as high as 47th post World Cup 49 to their present position of 50th in the World, slipping after the most recent CoH. Queer Poco el Mono Ara's largest ever victory came over Teletropis - winning 7-1 during WC49 Qualifying. The largest defeat in Queer Poco el Mono Ara's history was the 5-1 thumping at the hands of Somewhereistonia in a pre-World Cup Qualifying friendly prior to WC48. At present Ishmael Van Dyke is the country's highest goal scorer - topping the chart with 27 goals in 51 matches.
[edit] The Espinoza Reign
After scouring the world for a successor, the QPMAFA settled on Asdrubal Espinoza who, at the time, was coach of Albrecht Turkish of the CMSC. Asdrubal took over and coached the team in their first international competition, OXEN Cup XI, the results were diabolical and a disappointing 1-0-5 and Queer Poco returned home with only 3 points and a minus 10 goal difference. Espinoza's next job was to lead Queer Poco el Mono Ara in the Baptism of Fire 34 competition. This was marginally better as Queer Poco reached the regional semi-finals of the competition. After the Baptism of Fire tournament, Espinoza took charge of the team in their first attempts to qualify for the World Cup. This attempt was unsuccessful and Queer Poco lost half of their games, prompting many international fans to turn on Espinoza. After the average display during qualifying Espinoza took a break from managing the Queer Poco el Mono Ara national team and returned to club management helping CMSC side El din Marbles stave off relegation. Espinoza returned to the Queer Poco job in time for the team's second outing in the OXEN Cup. He made a number of changes to the sides, but one he didn't make himself was the retirment of former captain Ugo Stowell. At 34, the attacking midfielder decided to hang his international boots up having captained his country on 28 occasions. The changes to the side saw an improved performance on their last outing and the team reached the quarter finals. Espinoza then managed to guide the team to a well deserved 4th place spot in World Cup 48 Qualifying group 6 against some very tough opposition - including the Holy Empire, Sarzonia, Secristan and surprise package Antarctistan. The team managed to win half of their qualifying games, draw two and lose 5 - one loss was the shock defeat to Antarctistan at home. However it was during the second period of qualifying that international striker Frederico went missing in the Dreamed Realm and didn't return to Queer Poco el Mono Ara - seemingly normal, however due to the striker going AWOL he would be dropped from Espinoza's final team which he took to the Cup of Harmony 40. Following The White's elimination from the Cup of Harmony in the second round (despite having taken points in four of the five group games) Espinoza's contract was not renewed much to the disappointment of the fans. However losing the confidence of the players was attributed to Espinoza being allowed to walk despite him guiding the side to 56th in the World.
[edit] The B-Team Boss Miguel da Rossa
Miguel da Rossa, although normally charged with managing the Under 21's team coached the Queer Poco el Mono Ara B-Side at the Nakiti Robotics and Axx Software Opportunity Cup which took place in Queer Poco el Mono Ara whilst Espinoza made his last stand at the Cup of Harmony with the A-Team. Miguel's short tenure in charge was due to a clash in dates with the CoH and the Opportunity Cup and the new bosses take over at the helm. Da Rossa was chosen as interim manager on the basis he had managed to lead the under 21's to the final of the 10th Di Bradini Cup.
[edit] Joe Hamburgstein
Joe Hamburgstein was selected as new coach of Queer Poco el Mono Ara whilst Espinoza was still at the Cup of Harmony. Hamburgstein coached Jeruselem during World Cup 47 and World Cup 48 and his international coaching pedigree spoke for itself. Hamburgstein officially took over after the Opportunity Cup once the full roster of players became available for selection.
Hamburgstein's reign as Queer Poco manager started poorly winning only 1 match in his first 6 in charge, however a surprise win over Kosovoe kick started his tenure. During a topsy turvy World Cup 49 qualifying campaign he took charge as The White's took several big name scalps including Daehanjeiguk, Silexhera and Kosovoe plus a 3-3 draw with Somewhereistonia who in their previous meeting had beaten The Whtes 5-1. However during the campaign poor performances against Wajirka, Teletropis and Arkinesia halted the teams progress and Queer Poco el Mono Ara came third in the qualifying group missing out on qualifying by 5 points.
The major highlight of the campaign was QPeMA's 7-1 demolition of Teletropis in front of the home fans with top scorer Ishmael Van Dyke bagging his first international hat trick.
Following on from the misfortune of missing out on the World Cup, Hamburgstein took an unchanged side to Rushmore neighbour Pasarga for the Cup of Harmony 41. After the group draw everyone in the party and the fans and pundits a like were pleased with The Whites group, including four teams ranked below them. The Whites started off well, putting Eastfield Lodge away 4-0 but then went on to suffer their worst run of performances since their maiden international competition and suffered a string of 4 straight defeats and crashed out of the CoH bottom of the group.
After the CoH, Queer Poco el Mono Ara were lucky enough to host the second edition of the Copa Rushmori. Copa Rushmori II would offer Hamburgstein an opportunity to redeem himself following the shambolic performance. The team failed to qualify for the second round, winning 2 and losing 2 games and finishing third in the group behind Imgoona and Sargossa. The team's average performance was deemed ok and Hamburgstein would remain in charge for The White's qualifying campaign for the 50th World Cup.
[edit] Facts and Trivia
[edit] Stadium
Queer Poco el Mono Ara's national stadium is the Estadio de Victoria. The stadium can be found in the South of Queer Poco el Mono Ara outside the small town of Ambrose, the reasoning behind this location are it's easy access from all corners of the country with superb train lines and road links to the the town. It was also decided that Ambrose would be the home of national football as there was a large area of land which was previously the site of a shopping mall, which at the time was unused. Ambrose selection as the site for the national football team came as a shock as Khaldoon (The Capital City) was rejected to house the stadium, this was on the grounds that there were currently six professional football teams operating in Khaldoon.
The national stadium is the largest in the entire country holding a maximum capacity of 62,000 fans, 4,000 more than Real Minanda's Una Serie de Fútbol stadium, El Estadio de la Esperanza which holds 58,000.
[edit] Captains
| Player | # Games Captained |
| Ugo Stowell | 28 |
| Tomasz Poborsky | 67 |
[edit] QPeMA Top Scorers
Due to the relatively new status of Queer Poco el Mono Ara as an international football team, the top scorers list only takes into account those players who have scored 5 or more goals.
| # | Name | Position | Goals | Caps | Goals per game |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | Ishmael Van Dyke | Striker | 27 | 51 | 0.52 |
| 2 | Frederico | Striker | 17 | 41 | 0.41 |
| 3 | Frank Le Tissier | Midfield | 9 | 42 | 0.21 |
| 4 | Dean Bowyer | Midfield | 8 | 25 | 0.32 |
| 5 | Phillipe Deschamps | Striker | 7 | 20 | 0.35 |
| 6 | Alberto Xisco | Striker | 6 | 13 | 0.46 |
| 7 | Ugo Stowell | Midfield | 5 | 28 | 0.17 |
[edit] QPeMA managers
| Manager | Term | Played | Won | Drawn | Lost | Goals for | Goals against | Win percentage |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Mick McConaghey
| 1st Friendly | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 4 | 0 |
 Asdrubal Espinoza
| OXEN Cup XI to Cup of Harmony 40 | 63 | 24 | 12 | 27 | 104 | 107 | 38 |
| Joe Hamburgstein
| Copa Rushmori to Present | 31 | 12 | 7 | 12 | 57 | 44 | 38 |
[edit] Kits
Queer Poco el Mono Ara's home shirt, away shirt and alternative shirt. All kits were developed by Somewhereistonian company X-Spordiga, who have been the official manufacturer of of Queer Poco el Mono Ara's national team strip since their first international tournament.
[edit] Notable Players
Here a list of notable players who have contributed to the footballing tapestry of Queer Poco el Mono Ara and have been involved in degrees bordering on heroic. Players may have retired from the international scene or still be involved.
Petr Ollic QPeMA's #1 from World Cup 47 - World Cup 50
Tomasz Poborsky Long standing captain World Cup 48 to Present
Karim Zaki Long serving defender, debuted in World Cup 47
Ishmael Van Dyke QPeMA's leading goal scorer since World Cup 47
